Posts Tagged ‘when mothers of multiples give up completely’


In the words of Bono, “desperation is a tender trap,” or harness, as the case may be. There you have it ladies. A little device to tell the world that you have given up trying to manage your multiples. Well if you’re going to go there, I say go whole hog. Hook those babies up to a sled and brush up on Inuit dog commands. Rig up a cable  in the backyard and clip em on. If you don’t have a cable, just tie your twins to a tree and try to keep the cat from provoking them.

If you’re of a greener persuasion, why not have them power the backyard wind turbine on a windless day, or better yet, attach a yoke to them and they can plow the fields. Gotta harness the power of your twins!

All these options are available to you for the bargain price of 21.99 sterling, 29.99 for the triplet version.  Yes, there is a triplet version and I am dying to see it.   The “Twin and Triplet By My Side Harness Reins” retails in the UK, where the public is completely devoted to free range chickens but not so much free range babies. They take the short leash thing literally over there.

The harnesses come in a wide and curious array of colors including “butter cup” “mystic purple” and “smokie blue,” where smoky is spelled with an ie for unknown reasons.  I’m not sure if they ship to the US of A, but if not, just raid your local pet store.


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